Opposites Attract?

I was always under the impression that this saying was true because… well… after all, it is a long accepted cliché.  Who am I to argue?  But is it true?  Do opposites really attract?  And if so, is it wise to appease this attraction?

So I thought about it, in great depth.  I woke up one morning feeling inspired, feeling clarity of mind I hadn’t felt in some time.  All of these thoughts and feelings and ideas came spewing forth as I strained my fingers to keep up with my mind in writing it all down.  And when I was done writing, I was still reflecting.  I saw things previously unseen to me.  I saw similarities where I had only seen differences.  I saw that the answer is complicated in its simplicity.  I reflected on a situation where two people go about things quite opposite from each other but are driven by the same qualities.  They are polar opposites in the expression of their personalities but strikingly similar in their motives.  And yet, they are drawn to each other.  But is it the obvious differences that attract them to each other or is it the underlying similarities?

This has been my experience in my dating/relationship travels.  I am a jock, a homebody, an attention whore introvert (that’s my own personal classification) who is socially inept in group settings.  Many of my partners have been artists, traveling gypsies, social butterflies, and independent.  We’ve possessed extremely opposite qualities.  So what was the connection?  Where was the attraction?  The attraction was in the power.  Powerful people-people with drive, pride, passion, and determination are all attracted to power.  Break it down, strip us of all expressions of personality and look at the personality itself.  Both parties: Determined.  Passionate.  Driven.  Proud.  Strong.

We were the same as much as were different.  Each of us brought an element to the other that broadened our horizons, challenged our comfort zones and allowed us to experience things we normally would not have tried.  We were fundamentally the same and complementary expressively.  The relationships didn’t work out, but I believe it was this dynamic that brought us together in the first place, and kept us together for as long as it lasted.  I was their rock, their grounding force and they broke my out of my shell, set me free.

So do opposites attract?  Maybe.  But I think it’s more the similarities that attract and the complementary opposites that make the relationship, at least for me.  Everything in life is about finding balance between the extremes.  Why would what we look for in a life partner be any different?  We are only one piece of the equation.  Our partner is the other.  For the relationship to work, we must balance each other out.